Saturday, December 20, 2008
Fabulous new website
Forget the usual beauty advice... Visit http://www.thisandthat.info/ to find practical, home-grown advice on a a variety of topics such as health, beauty, diet and fitness. This is advice that works.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Benign Girl!
This piece of cardboard appeared on my front lawn one garbage day. What a wonderful name is Benign Girl. I wonder if she has an evil twin named Malignant Bitch. And what superpowers do these chicks have?
The instructions are exceedingly helpful. They tell us that non-rechargeable batteries are not to be recharged. But, do not use rechargeable batteries in this toy. Wow, thanks for the free advice! The supply terminals are not to be short-circuited. Well I wouldn't dream of it. Because I don't know what that even means. Exhausted batteries are to be removed from the toy. What exhaustive battery advice! My guess is that this toy manufacturer was taking no chances on breaching North American toy safety standards.
One mystifying thing to note (as if the actual name "Benign Girl" isn't mystifying in and of itself) is the little picture of the garbage can with a slash through it at the bottom of the picture. Indicating what exactly? That this toy is not to be thrown in the garbage? Is that because Benign Girl is actually hazardous waste? Or what?
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Monday, November 26, 2007
Super Letter Game
Hello my name is Lisapizzza and I am addicted to Super Letter Game. Go ahead and google it if you want to risk getting addicted yourself.
The object of Super Letter Game is to click on all the letters of the alphabet, but be careful not to click on the multitudinous letter 'z' more than once, as that will end the game. That's pronounced "zed" here in Canada and the rest of the world. Did you Americans make it "zee" just so it would rhyme when you sang the alphabet song? Just curious. But I digress. The letters move away from the cursor when you move your mouse so it's not so easy to just click on them. You have to kind of fish them towards you.
There are two top ten leaderboards for those who manage to click on the entire alphabet. One board is for the top ten fastest scores. The other board is for the top ten people who have played the most games. I couldn't get into the fastest times, but I did make it into the most played. Quantity over quality. To date I have played 336 games. I want to make it to number one, but that position is occupied by "337LEE NYC USA !!!" This person has played 1004 games. At 2.5 minutes per game, that represents almost 42 hours of their life clicking an the abcd's. Yikes!
Even though I'm only in the quantity over quality board, I can brag that I have at least completed the game faster than anybody else in the quantity over quality board. My fastest time is 1:04:68 minutes. Even "337LEE NYC USA !!!", with all his or her practice of over a thousand games, has only a fastest time of 1:09:90 minutes. Ha. So there!
The object of Super Letter Game is to click on all the letters of the alphabet, but be careful not to click on the multitudinous letter 'z' more than once, as that will end the game. That's pronounced "zed" here in Canada and the rest of the world. Did you Americans make it "zee" just so it would rhyme when you sang the alphabet song? Just curious. But I digress. The letters move away from the cursor when you move your mouse so it's not so easy to just click on them. You have to kind of fish them towards you.
There are two top ten leaderboards for those who manage to click on the entire alphabet. One board is for the top ten fastest scores. The other board is for the top ten people who have played the most games. I couldn't get into the fastest times, but I did make it into the most played. Quantity over quality. To date I have played 336 games. I want to make it to number one, but that position is occupied by "337LEE NYC USA !!!" This person has played 1004 games. At 2.5 minutes per game, that represents almost 42 hours of their life clicking an the abcd's. Yikes!
Even though I'm only in the quantity over quality board, I can brag that I have at least completed the game faster than anybody else in the quantity over quality board. My fastest time is 1:04:68 minutes. Even "337LEE NYC USA !!!", with all his or her practice of over a thousand games, has only a fastest time of 1:09:90 minutes. Ha. So there!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Customer "Care"
Ahhh how I love being "cared" for by the Customer Care Department of BigCorpCreditCo, et al. When I am forced to contact somebody at Customer Care, who is inevitably in a call centre on the other side of the planet, which is staffed by people with incomprehensible accents, speaking through phone lines both fuzzy and clicky, and who are paid a fraction of the wage that BigCorpCreditCo would have to pay if they were to set up this call centre in their own country.... why then my heart just bursts with pride at the thought that I am a part of BigCorpCreditCo's machine! Loved for and cared for! Just like my mama used to care for me. Oh wait, my mom was a cold fish who thought regular meals were a fine subsitute for love and affection. I see a paralell here.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Happy for now
Last week a motorist tried to run me off the road, and since I protested, he slowed down and tried a few more homicidal tricks to teach me to shut my mouth. I was so mad that I was completely unable to vent in this space. I took sleeping pills to get to sleep that night. The next day I was all wacked out from the pills and still stewing over that motorist. If I got any madder or obsessed with running it through my mind, I would have lost my mind.
Having reached the nadir of anger, there was only one way to go -- towards the zenith of happiness. Funny thing. I've felt pretty darn chipper this last week. I couldn't concentrate on being mad because being mad made me too mad. It's fine to be a little mad and rant about the annoying things in life. But when something really anger-inducing happens, if you let yourself get really angry then you're doomed.
I'm happy for now. And hey, my husband even started turning the wee one's clothes right way out before chucking them in the laundry basket. Life is good!
Having reached the nadir of anger, there was only one way to go -- towards the zenith of happiness. Funny thing. I've felt pretty darn chipper this last week. I couldn't concentrate on being mad because being mad made me too mad. It's fine to be a little mad and rant about the annoying things in life. But when something really anger-inducing happens, if you let yourself get really angry then you're doomed.
I'm happy for now. And hey, my husband even started turning the wee one's clothes right way out before chucking them in the laundry basket. Life is good!
Monday, September 17, 2007
I'm Bored!
Previously I extolled the virtures of boredom. Oh, said I, how pleasant to sit and stare at the walls and have nothing to do.
So here I sit, staring at the walls, with nothing to do, and oh god am I bored! I am going to die of bordeom if something doesn't drop into my inbox soon. Oh yes, did I mention? I am at work. I would love to work, if only I had something to do. To make matters worse, my entire department seems to be missing today, except for me, and I have nobody to gossip with. Nobody to send dumb joke-mail to. Nobody to have lunch with. One co-worker called in sick because she has to study for a night-class. Two other people were here earlier, but have now independently and mysteriously disappeared. Others have just not shown up at all today, I don't know why.
What kind of crazy office is this?? What am I here for? I give the appearance of working, but in fact my efforts at this place are simply to surf the internet for 8 hours or so and write long emails to friends who live in other cities. When I feel like doing something moderately work-related I will delete unimportant emails from my sent folder, and delete the deleted items from the deleted folder. There's something enjoyable about possibly causing myself serious problems down the line by deleting some email that may have been important. Hah. But I can't do that just yet because I am bored and I refuse to do anything fun.
It's the halfway point of the day, and the thought of another 3 and a half hours to spend in this manner is too much. The long empty afternoon looms like a giant axe of boredom over my head.
I think I could be safely down-sized.
So here I sit, staring at the walls, with nothing to do, and oh god am I bored! I am going to die of bordeom if something doesn't drop into my inbox soon. Oh yes, did I mention? I am at work. I would love to work, if only I had something to do. To make matters worse, my entire department seems to be missing today, except for me, and I have nobody to gossip with. Nobody to send dumb joke-mail to. Nobody to have lunch with. One co-worker called in sick because she has to study for a night-class. Two other people were here earlier, but have now independently and mysteriously disappeared. Others have just not shown up at all today, I don't know why.
What kind of crazy office is this?? What am I here for? I give the appearance of working, but in fact my efforts at this place are simply to surf the internet for 8 hours or so and write long emails to friends who live in other cities. When I feel like doing something moderately work-related I will delete unimportant emails from my sent folder, and delete the deleted items from the deleted folder. There's something enjoyable about possibly causing myself serious problems down the line by deleting some email that may have been important. Hah. But I can't do that just yet because I am bored and I refuse to do anything fun.
It's the halfway point of the day, and the thought of another 3 and a half hours to spend in this manner is too much. The long empty afternoon looms like a giant axe of boredom over my head.
I think I could be safely down-sized.
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